Ban Bossy

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Yet again, the modern feminist continues to astound with her detachment from reality. In an attempt to usurp yet even more power, Sheryl Sandberg, who’s some sort of big-whig at Facebook, started a new social engineering program called Ban Bossy.  The premise behind Ban Bossy is that assertive women are called bossy, while assertive men are considered leaders.

I pointed out the website to a friend of mine, who dejectedly messaged me back, saying that in all 4 decades of his life, it was only after receiving the BB message that he’d finally realized that only women were considered bossy in America.  The bossy men, otherwise known as assholes, jerks, micromanaging tyrants, and snakes in suits are held in much higher regard than bossy women, or so Sheryl Sandberg would have us believe.

Unfortunately a group of famous and ironically powerful ( a sense of irony is the first thing to go among Utopians) female leaders have taken to the BB podium, urging us all to never remind females that diplomacy, leading by example, respect, and truly caring for others is paramount to not only being a good leader, but having other people believe you’re a good leader. Beyonce throws the word Bitch around in her songs but here, she reminds us she’s not Bossy, by declaring “I’m not bossy, I am the boss.”

If I made such a statement to the men in my platoon in the Army, I would immediately lose all their respect, perhaps irrevocably.

Adam Grant, Ph.D, writes an excellent, though overly PC for my taste, post  in Psychology Today, addressing female bossiness. What he has to say matches exactly my own experience. He writes:

We react very differently when power is exercised by high-status and low-status people. In a pair of clever experiments, researchers Alison Fragale, Jennifer Overbeck, and Maggie Neale show that when people with high status also possess power, we perceive them as dominant, but also warm. We hold them in high regard, so we’re willing to follow their commands. When the same commands come from people who lack status, we judge them as dominant and cold. Since they haven’t earned our respect, they don’t have the right to tell us what to do.

When young women get called bossy, it’s often because they’re trying to exercise power without status. It’s not a problem that they’re being dominant; the backlash arises because they’re overstepping their status.

This is precisely my experience in the Army. I have worked for a couple of female leaders, and worked along side others that clearly thought they were leaders. One female 1 SG, who was way over her head, was bossy on steroids, yet could sometimes be seen crying in her office. Clearly, she always tried to exercise power beyond her status and it rubbed many people the wrong way, to the point that several of them wrote letters of complaint to the company commander. I also witnessed on several occasions, females who tried too hard to stand out and succeed, perhaps with the subliminal belief that they had to compete against men. The most competitive female I’ve ever worked with in the Army had virtually no friends at the time I knew her.

This is not to say that leaders should appear weak. Indeed, the opposite, as Machiavelli pointed out, is true. The problem with many women, is that they do not understand that demanding respect is seen as weakness. The second we feel the need to declare ourselves Caesar, we show we doubt ourselves.

Many women find it frustrating that men excel is leadership positions and attribute this to a system that selects men merely because they are men. Again, so out of touch are many women brought up in the age of Girl Power, they cannot perceive the truth of the matter. Men, from day one, are raised in an environment of competition. We are expected to be strong and to win. We quickly learn what works and what does not, and we rarely have some all-powerful or bossy organization, like the US government or a womens’ rights org to turn to if we fail. We don’t even have societal pressures to protect us. Trial and error always trumps academic musings. We learn on the playground that if we are too bossy, we may get punched in the nose. Girls don’t have this learning tool, as we all know from a young age that hitting girls is worse than hitting boys. Thus, we learn diplomacy, and if not we get branded the school bully.  Our leadership skills grow organically, and we understand that hierarchy is inherent in nature.  Sure we want to be on top, but we understand nothing beats hard work and competence.

Some women become frustrated when they are placed in leadership positions and people fail to respond to them. Studies show that young girls are very concerned with the perception of others, that people will not like them because they are leaders. To me, this shows that women actually do think being bossy is leadership.  They believe they must be unlikable to lead. So they try to be friends with some people, and then immediately shift to the bossy side of the spectrum when things don’t go the way they want. I see this sort of thing with modern mothers. they try to be friends to their children instead of parents. They are afraid of offending their child and think the child will not love them if they don’t act like as a peer does. But parents should never be seen as the peers of their children. Many mothers gleefully Facebook and text with their 13 year old daughters, as if they were sisters. The end result of this is that instead of being able to exercise authority by telling the child to be home at a certain time, or doing their homework, squabbles ensue that resemble fights between siblings. In the past my wife has become frustrated with our two daughters, because they unquestionably obey me, but when I leave the house will sometimes even resort to mild forms of physical violence against her, such as a kick to the leg from the 4 year old when she doesn’t want to get dressed. The 4 year old won’t display such aggression around me, let alone direct it at me. My wife believes this is some sort of magic which the universe has unjustly bestowed upon men. But I think it’s because men grow up in a world that asks more of them.

The more women believe and tout the mythology that they have it tougher than men, the less likely they will be received as leaders in this world. They should stop and consider why the ultimate act of despair, suicide, should be so overwhelmingly a male phenomena. Out of the 110 countries listed in Wikipedia under “List of countries by suicide rate”, only in one is the rate higher for women than men. In many other countries the rate for men is double or triple that of women.

The feminists are bringing even more scorn upon women in leadership positions with the Ban Bossy movement, without even proving  a problem. Respect and the title of leader is always earned. We can earn rank and titles, but status comes with accomplishment. The more women stomp their feet in protest, the more they damage their position.





5 thoughts on “Ban Bossy

    Royce said:
    March 28, 2014 at 2:02 pm

    Very interesting and truthfull assessment. Respect is earned through action and the fastest way to lose respect is to demand it. I have worked with many women and with a couple of exceptions they were excellent in their jobs and had my respect as well as that of all of their colleagues. Women like Sandberg epitomize those feminists who cannot compete on a level playing field so they resort to these sort of tactics to explain their failures in leadership and in gaining the respect of others. I just ignore people like this. I feel that as an officer I gained more respect from my troops by laughing at myself and admitting to my mistakes, than trying to be perfect and demanding unearned respect.

    magus71 responded:
    March 28, 2014 at 5:36 pm

    Royce, one difference in the army is that some women join because it is a classically male job; they want to prove to the world they can do it, and thus spend their whole career with a chip on their shoulder or feeling entitled. It’s the same with some single women who have children just to prove they can do it all.

    apollonian said:
    March 31, 2014 at 7:35 pm

    Observe What’s REALLY Up–(a) Economic Collapse, (b) Hence WAR

    All of this by magus is very well taken, as usual, but I submit magus and others may seriously be missing what the actual pt. to all this really is.

    After all, isn’t it really pretty obvious for what magus tells us?–so what’s the REAL pt. to ZOG’s agenda and program?

    Comrades, u really need to face-up to the facts in-ur-face: ZOG is not only preparing, but actually waging war against us, and this magus talks about is just the tip-of-iceberg psy-ops.

    Note the distinct and indisputable race-war that’s already manifest and on-going, including the “knock-out” game/campaign being conducted in various cities, not only in USA too. Note the racial prop. pushed on MSNBC and CNN, also FOX too–THIS AIN’T NO ACCIDENT, comrades.

    Observe the armored vehicles being rolled-out in the cities, even towns and small-towns–observe the militarized police cracking-down on little girls’ lemonade stands and home-owners’ vegetable gardens–comrades, this is all deliberate and of a piece w. conspiratorial consolidation of New World Order gov., including AGENDA-21 genocide.

    So u ought not be distracted or diverted by this sort of overt idiocy by these homosexuals and lesbian morons–there’s MORE, much more than perhaps meets the eye, and it’s very ominous and serious.

    Observe there’s a huge problem that cannot be ignored, though ZOG tries–and that’s huge, absolute, catastrophic currency-collapse imminent and up-coming–it can’t and won’t be stopped, and that’s the next “shoe” to be dropping on all our heads, soon.

    Thus ZOG will use the economic collapse as excuse to install more centralized gov./dictatorship even in face of huge price-increases for food and fuel, and it’s not likely to work, so ZOG MUST have a war lined-up–the traditional distraction/diversion for economic crime and mis-management.

    apollonian said:
    March 31, 2014 at 10:36 pm

    Doubt outright war is being waged against Christianity, US Const., rule-of-law, etc.?–ck this story, absolutely amazing:

    I also saw the vid that goes along w. this.

    uvalduvalcuckoo said:
    April 10, 2014 at 3:31 am

    Somehow I missed a few of your posts including this one. This has to be one of the most LULZILY stupid concepts ever invented. I remember reading about this female recent PhD grad who talked about negotiating strategies at her “Lean In” group – she negotiated herself out of the job – and the market for Philosophy professors isn’t really deep these days. As noted elsewhere though, the whole concept , outside of being lulzy is self-contradictory – they put up a whole slew of super successful women that were called Bossy as kids – correlation != causation but one could be forgiven for thinking getting called Bossy is a pre-req for female super success. I don’t see it happening soon, but I hope I live long enough for circle jerky social media activism to be seen for the meaningless crap it is (along with its ugly little sister, ‘raising awareness’.

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